Yeh hai mumbai meri jaan !!

"Bhaiyya Big bazaar ? " I say for the umpteenth time as I watch the autowallah zoom past me. Sometimes they dont even nod their heads implying a "No", they just accelerate out of sight. At others they manage to pass a wicked smile. I turn back and look along the length of the road, my eyes scanning the back seats of every auto that passes in the hope that some autowallah will have mercy and drop me off to work, the nearest landmark to which is yes, you guessed it , a Big Bazaar. " Inko Bandra tak ka bhaada chahiye " . (" They want to go to far away places like Bandra where they'll fetch larger fares") one passerby remarks observing the desperation on my face as the next auto ditches me.

Whats Ironical is that theres an Auto stand rite next to the soceity I live in. All that goes through my mind every morning as I start walking from my Mumbai flat is the hope that today I won't have to go through that humiliating ordeal of Auto wallahs zooming past you as if you just asked them to go to Jhumritallaya. Most of the times they will be going in the same direction as well but wont bother making a quick ten bucks. At others they will continued reading newspapers, chatting, drinking their morning tea, cleaning their autos and tightening screws with screwdrivers but its obviously taboo to carry a passenger to a nearby place.It amazes me.

So heres how it works. Me and my friends, four of us divide ourselves into groups of two each day. Our usual 'strategy' is to keep walking and asking every empty auto if he will forgive us for taking a flat 'near' our work place and bless us with his generous "lift" till Big Bazaar. I believe if we asked for lifts from cars we'd get to our office earlier. There have been times when we kept walking, and asking , then walked a little more, asked another bunch of autos, waited some more, walked furthur and furthur, and " Whoala " reached our office on foot. We tried naming places that exist nearby to fool them into it, " Bhaiyya hanuman nagar ?" " Station tak chaloge ? " But all in vain. On another occasion I and my friend Roshan were hardly 5 minutes away from the office by foot. But we still kept asking and one guy agreed. We took the Auto just for the satisfaction of having travelled in an Auto after all those efforts.

Each day is a struggle. A fight. When I get an early auto my face lights up like the ones my company manufactures. I surprise myself with my own reactions. This maximum city pushes my mind to wonder. Whether I will ever be able to decipher the psychology of these auto wallahs is left to time, till then I just hope I find my daily auto to work and back.

Mute Opinion

I wonder how it would be had I been a loquatious person. A talktative one. Umm....Lets see.

I would get to hear my voice a lot, so the next time my own voice echos back to me when I'm on the phone I wont wonder " What.. thats how I sound ..weird ".

I would have people look towards me more often than at others.I would instantly come up with topics to talk about in a group.

There have been so many times when Im with a person and conversations going on.. and then he says things and then I add things, but he has said more than his fair share of things, so
now its my turn after the you know 'awkward silent moment' in the conversation to say something but nothing pops in my mind. Absolutely nothing. Sometimes I even conciously make an
effort to think what topic could interest us, but in vain.So well Im left there. Staring. Wondering whether that guy thinks i am some boring geek .
But it doesnt bother me at all. I dont 'wish' that I was talktative. Because its not that I dont have thoughts. I just invariably speak only when necessary. In a similar manner, I have
opinions and they do come out in a healthy conversation. May be I don't like giving everyone my opinion without being asked for it. I beleive staying silent at the right time is just as
important as saying something when it matters. At times being silent also lets you slip away leaving the interpretation to the listener itself. Silence is as powerful as speech.

I get along well with talkative people. Two silent people and two talkative people wouldn't make a constructive conversation. In the former it would become boring and in the latter each
one would probably not bother what the other was saying. I know i'm a good listener. People who talk need people who listen as well. Its interesting how the world is full of such opposite
pairs. Sometimes I wonder whether god gave me such big protruding ears for the same reason. May be I'm meant to be a good listener after all !! HeHe !

What we silent people dont 'speak' out of our mouths obviously finds ways through our facial expressions and eyes. Sometimes through a smile that effectively says " I agree". Sometimes
the same smile says " I dont think so ". Off course the person should know us to interpret which one is it. And its not difficult even after knowing us a little. For all the others who don't
know us, we enjoy the stealth fully.

Silence spawns thought. Sometimes constructive at times completely random and unnecessary . People have asked me where I was lost many a times. Thats because my mind takes a
thread and starts developing a thought process on it which continues till its interrupted. A word said, a picture seen, a sound heard is enough to initiate a potential thread. Such things
happen often if i'm bored or when i'm alone. When I am interested , I am listening, even if I am staring into the air, I know i am listening.Thought can get you involved a lot. So i also
appear serious to many people. I was once asked why I look depressed. My teacher once said " Why are you sad shantanu ". I love my life. I love the way I am. People !! Silence is not
sadness. Its peace.

Silence is a tool, not a handicap. Silence is not a fear to speak but a mere ignorance to waste ones energies on something unneccesary. Silence can instill peace at times and be enraging
at others. Silence can be just as loud as anything else. Silence isnt the absence of knowledge or opinion, it infact is an interestingly hidden mute opinion.